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Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Memories of Derek...

I know that it has been a really long time since I posted... sorry!

This last weekend, one of our long time friends, Derek Johnson, was killed in the line of duty as a police officer. This has has a great effect on our family, especially since my dad has been a firefighter my entire life and the possibility of him losing his life while on duty has always been a concern at the back of my mind. 

This morning as I was driving to the gym, I listened as Devin Johnson and his wife talked about Derek and how the community could help Shante and their son Ben. One of the things that Devin asked was for people that have known Derek to share their memories of him with the family. As I sat in the gym parking lot literally crying, I was impressed that I needed to write down the memories that our family has of Derek. The following is the letter that I have written for the Sidwell and Johnson families; it has been a very personal and difficult letter to write but it is my hope that it will help with the healing process... not only for the families directly impacted but also for those that were in the Draper 1st ward with Derek and Shante. I hope that our memories will bring a smile to you and that we can all heal over time and with the help of our loving Heavenly Father.


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This last week has been a rough one for many with the loss of Derek. My younger brother, Aaron, just happened to be visiting from Nashville on Sunday when we found out that Derek had lost his life. It came as a shock and left our hearts aching for Shante and Ben as well as the Sidwell and Johnson families. Our family has known both families for well over 20 years; when Derek and his family moved to Draper from Sandy, Derek and my brother Aaron become the best of friends, if you found one of them, the other was not far behind. I can remember both of them causing me endless grief and teasing.
            On Sunday evening as we gathered as a family to say a special prayer for the Johnson and Sidwell families, we began to share the many memories that we have of Derek. Many people are recalling memories of Sgt. Johnson and what a good man that he was. Our memories are of Derek are as a teenage boy that brought many smiles to our home and caused a lot of havoc in between. I thought that a few of these memories might bring a smile to those whose hearts are broken at this time.
            Aaron recounted many stories of the trouble that he and Derek caused. The summer before their 9th grade year, it was a goal for them to sneak out of the house every Saturday night during the summer… and apparently they did just that! Aaron remembers them wandering the newer neighborhoods in Draper and going into homes that were under construction to practice SWAT team moves because Derek had every intention of one day joining the force. He also recalls them breaking a window in my parent’s home with a slingshot full of rocks and then staging it to look like it had been caused by a football… My dad chuckled a bit at this memory and just said that he was too busy raising boys to become good men to worry about how the window had been broken.
            One of my favorite memories of Derek and Aaron was right after they had met. Aaron had gone the 1st 12 years of his life being called by his middle name of Scott. After meeting Derek, the two of them got it into their heads that my brother should switch over to being called Aaron instead of Scott. I remember the two of them sitting in the living room when I asked Aaron why the need to change his name after so many years… The reply that I got was that he and Derek had decided that Aaron was a much more romantic name and that he would have better luck with the girls if he went by Aaron. The boys were very insistent and the name was changed, every time I have recalled that conversation, I can’t help but laugh a little over the antics of two teenage boys.
            My husband and older brother shared memories of coaching Derek in the Deacon’s basketball team, taking him along to help DJ church dances- because he was a tough kid and could lift the heavy speakers, and of him crashing into and denting my husband’s beloved truck, just to name a few.
            Aaron is also insistent that he gets credit for first introducing Derek and Shante. Derek was new to the ward and Aaron was showing him around when they ran into Shante. As they often say, the rest is history. None of us can really have memories of Derek without mentioning Shante; they were always together. I can remember teasing Derek about it and telling him that it was just a crush that would pass. Derek would always become insistent that it was real love that would never go away and it never has. It has hit very close to home for my husband and I to realize that we share a similar story to Derek and Shante. There were 4 couples from the Draper 1st ward that met as teenagers and later married; Derek and Shante are one as are my husband and I. Of the four couples that married, two have now been separated by the death of their spouse. It makes me so thankful to know that we have the knowledge of life after death and that this is by no means the end. It really gives me a new appreciation of Eternal Marriage and the bond that is created through that ordinance.
            Our family has many fond memories of Derek and his love of life. As a Registered Nurse, it is very difficult for me personally to deal with death because I have chosen to help people heal as my life’s work. I have had to stop many times in writing this to wipe the tears from my eyes, as my heart is hurting for the Sidwell and Johnson families. It is my hope that these memories will bring some sort of healing to those whose hearts are broken and need to be healed. We truly believe that this healing is possible through our loving Heavenly Father- He has a plan for all of us and I know that He is carrying Shante and Benson at this point in their lives and He will continue to heal them through His loving power. We deeply express our grief and sorrow for your family and we have felt a true loss at Derek’s passing. Please know that you are in our hearts, thoughts and prayers and we look forward to the day that we will be able to see Derek again.

All of Our Love,

Ryan and Stephanie Greenwood